.Wednesday, July 06, 2005 ' 9:35 am Y
Tryin my best 2 b str0ng while typing diz.
been MIA 4 awhile.
so much has happened.
thx everyone hu showed their concern.
it wasnt simply me seeing things.
it was so much more den dat.
apparently sum cowards used evil 2 wreck my family's peace.
shall nt elaborate on dat.
so makhluk halus(spirits) were sent 2 my hse.
n of all my family members,i was d victim.
i saw things.hear things.cudnt sleep.nitemares.
since last saturday.
so my grandma went 2 seek help frm sum1.
he was d one hu told us abt d spirits sent 2 disturb us.
as soon as he saw me,his look totally changed.
he den checked on me.
muttered sum prayers.held my toes.
after a while he asked,"do u feel anythin?"
yeah.my legs were tired.
n he said "ade bende kt dlm bdn awak" (derz sumthin inside u)
i froze in terror.
terrified of myself.
it took me a long time 2 calm down.
cried.
i cried alot.
i cant believe it.
im goin thru diz AGAIN.
yeah ive been 'possessed' once.
when i was a kid.
haiz.
so yest i skipped sch.
went 2 my granny's hse.
go
berubat.
he gave me sumtin 2 drink n recite.
he say i'll haf 2 constantli do as he say n i'll b fine.
if my bowels come out black in colour,means d 'thing' is outta my body.
i'll keep praying.
yes i will.
was so weak.
each time i recite sum prayers,my legs get weak.
my body temp rises.
was burnin yest.
couldnt walk much.
hear things each time i start reciting.
feel things near me while im prayin.
bt dun worry,i feel better now.
stronger.
im gonna fite diz.
my bf was so so so sweet thruout diz period of time.
he stayed up all nite 4 me d last 2 nites.
made sure i am ok b4 he slept.
he slept at 6 am till his work starts.
no guy has ever done dat 4 me b4.
he calls once in a while.
yest he came 2 my hse.
keep me company.gave me support.
wif my fam,grandparents..
i glad he's der 4 me.
d guy hu helped me.
came 2 my hse too.
apparently he saw sumthin in my parents' room.
nt mine.
its realli2 odd.
in my parents rm?n i ended up d victim?
mopped d floors wif salt water.
2nite we'r gonna 'smoke' d hse.
get rid of evil spirits.
so yest i was so pale.
cudnt eat.drink.sleep.
he was so worried 4 me wen he 1st saw me.
so frail looking.
perspiring.weak.
he gave me everythin dat i needed.
gawd i lurve him.
he made me so much stronger.
d thing is still following me.
im struggling 2 fite it.
2 b strong.
bt im blessed 2 haf my loved ones.
especially my sister n bf.
rite now,having dem by my side is my biggest strength.
i asked nizam.
will he still accept me after ive changed.
n he said yes.
he'll b by my side no matter wad.
n he prefers it dat way.
me.changing.
he'll love me 4 hu i was,i am n hu i will be.
he accompanied me 2 go get sum stuff 4 mummy.
didnt let me go alone at nite.
in fact,frm now on,i'll haveta b home latest by 10plus.
sooo much sacrifice.
i'll haf 2 do it.
no more lepak2 till late.
may nt b able 2 blog much.
jus 2 let u all noe wads g0in on.
thx 4 ur advice dee n limejuice.
will do exactly as u suggested.
please pray 4 my recovery.
thx guys.
Ladysweet Yani